Self-deprecating wroclove.rb 2023 lightning talk about procrastination. The speaker avoids 'real work' by tweaking shell aliases in fish (friendly interactive shell), which he prefers because its scripting language is actually readable (unlike bash). Walks through making `git switch` shorter: first a git alias NB for 'new branch' (so `git NB my-branch` works), then a shell alias GNB so three characters suffice. Demonstrates a shell-init script that parses git config and auto-generates shell aliases from every git alias so both `git WC` and `gwc` work. Key twist: while any shell can do aliases, fish's 'abbreviations' expand to the full command on space, preserving full readability when pair programming with juniors or showing the screen to non-technical people. Ends by recommending fish's abbreviation documentation.