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Should I have told my partner about the rumor?

question 1 connections

Adam Piotrowski asks the wroclove.rb 2025 audience whether, at the start of a partner relationship, he should have shared an unproven rumor (gleaned from a friend's company) that the newly hired senior developer had previously been suspected of moonlighting. Audience consensus: it depends — seven years into the partnership he would say it immediately, but in the first few months it's harder. Adam's own takeaway: 'don't be that guy' — trust is worth preserving.

answer_summary
It depends on trust with the partner; with an established 7-year relationship he'd share immediately, but early on the cost of sharing an unproven rumor may outweigh the benefit.
question Should I have told my partner about the rumor?
asked_at
Adam posed the question to the audience during his talk.

Provenance